Campaign Finance

Campaign finance reform seems to be a problem for legislators. I don't see why. The congressional mindset for handling money seems clear enough. As a civic minded citizen I have drafted the following bill in a manner I think every member of congress would applaud and appreciate. I call it CB-101, a Citizen's Bill to Save Nuns and Orphans.

ARTICLE 1 -Only candidates, themselves, will be allowed to receive political contributions. Individuals, and corporations may contribute up to $5000 per candidate each year. Contributions must be sent to an Income Redistribution Service (IRS) office which will collect the funds in the candidate's name for anonymous redistribution to their campaign. There would be no receipts and canceled checks would be retained by the IRS until the candidate left office. Of course anonymous contributions would mean any lobbyist or special interest group could claim to support every candidate up for election each year without ever actually spending a dime.

ARTICLE 2 -Prior to withdrawal, said funds will be subject to a Federal Income and Contributions Assessment (FICA) equal to the current capital gains tax. In addition, fifteen percent of the contribution shall be set aside in a Civil Security account to help underwrite congressional pensions.

ARTICLE 3 -Upon passing an OSHA inspection and a compliance review of the Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990, and with the submission of a proper Environmental Impact Statement and proof of insurance, the candidate would be entitled to make application for his contributions upon his graduation from a sexual harassment sensitivity course. Applications may be requested only in person at the local county tax office - in the same line where you go to get your license plates renewed. Candidates will be required to fill out forms I-9 and W-4. To prove his citizenship and party affiliation, a voter registration certificate, valid photo ID and either a passport or birth certificate must be shown. He will be polygraphed, tested for drugs and alcohol, fingerprinted and a computer search will be made for driving infractions, overdue library books, delinquent taxes, warrants or any other possible criminal record.

Five days later, he will be entitled to return and claim his money.

Jack McNally

WIN a FREE Country